And no, I'm not pregnant. ;-) I'm embarking on a 40 week project that I'm very, very excited about. My goal in 40 weeks is to quit my job, take the summer off, and then think about next steps. I do not want to go back to a full on, demanding career, but I will likely explore consulting or something part time starting next fall.
This is a huge, huge step for me & I'm very excited, nervous, etc. There will be a lot of work & planning that will need to go into getting our family financially ready for this life change, & I'll be blogging about my progress to stay the course & stay on track.
I've been in a burn out mode for quite some time, and next summer will mark my 19th year working full time in a very demanding industry. I'd like to make it to 20 (because round numbers are fun ;)), but I'm way past the point of being able to commit to another year.
As I look at our lives & my energy level when I come home from work every day, it's clear that our lives are out of whack with our stated priorities. And, I'm just ready to make a change and spend more time with my family. It's crazy, right? Most people take time off when their kids are infants (I didn't - I went back to work when Sam was 16 weeks old, and N was 12 weeks old), but I've never felt more like now is the right time for me to spend with them. They notice my absences more, they pick up on my stress level when I come home, and they need me. They need an attentive & available parent who is not overwhelmed every night, traveling, and getting on calls in the evenings several times a week. It's just not working for us.
So, what's next?!! Well, I'm going to break the 40 weeks into phases, of course. First up is to build a rough draft of a financial plan & figure out exactly what it would take to get us there. The 40 weeks is roughly tied to when the boys get out of school, as well as a stock vest that I'd like to earn at work.
I'm really nervous about this, so please share any advice, input, etc!
Good for you! You can totally do this. The key is a good financial plan. I left my government job to start a company - the results have been great - but I made sure ALL my financial ducks were in a row first. (Able to live off spouse income, savings, debt free, reduced cost of living but to a still comfortable level - we shelved travel for a while - that alone saved tons). I'll be sure to watch for these posts and add any comments I think may be helpful. I'm super excited for you and glad to see you taking this step. You've seemed ready to go for awhile now. :-)
ReplyDeleteThank you!!!! I have been so, so ready for a while now. ;-)
DeleteI am so freaking excited for you!! We went from two extremely demanding jobs and very high salaries (Triple 6 figs) to making less than 100000 a year and are completely happy! Yes, the lifestyle changed. We downsized the house by half in term of size and price. We only buy used cars *but extremely nice ones at that. We cook from scratch (you already do that, I am completely impressed by how you still manage to do so much when you are so busy) and our lives are sooo much better. I was sure hubby was going to have a heart attack. The way we did it was self-employment and by being able to live on a lot less there is less pressure on the business which is succeeding rather well. We actually had to increase my salary this year as there was too much money left in the company account at the end of the year. Little to no debit is the biggest thing. Just think about it - no nanny costs, no childcare costs (unless you want a datenight) and you get more time with your kids and your husband. I don't really know exactly what you do - but after 20 years you probably have a ton of skills that could be converted into part-time employment or self-employment rather easily. It is possible - you have basically been training yourself for this part for a while with your money managing ways. Plus - your health can only get better for it. A stressful job totally sucks when you have the disease you do.
ReplyDeleteWe are in a very similar situation, but will only be adjusting the one salary. It's going to be quite a lifestyle adjustment, but I'm very excited. I want to focus on my family & my health & myself. It feels crazy to even say that, but none of those things make it to the top of my list these days.
DeleteI say go for it.....the only regrets you will have are if you don't try it.
ReplyDeleteI agree - fear has been holding me back for quite some time, and that's not a reason to hang onto something that's not working for you
DeleteWow! I have been waiting for you to say this. I know you started working part time before you moved to California and loved it. I don't think you will regret it all. I love that I have been there for my older kids and my husband says he loves that I there for him and them as well. You can do this. No advise other than you will never think you have enough money, but somehow, you find a way to make it work.
ReplyDeleteI didn't work part time, but I did work remotely for about a month when we first moved, and then took a few weeks off before I started this job. I really wish I would have taken more time off. I was already super burned out & it was a mistake to go into a job as intense as this with that mind set. But, c'est la vie! And you're are right, I panic about the finances, but we're in much better shape than many people & I know I"m never going to feel like it's enough. As soon as I feel that way, I talk myself into setting the bar even higher. ;-)
DeleteGood for you! I did the same thing this past May. You and I are roughly the same age and both work in crazy industries. I had a very stressful job with extremely long work hours to just "keep up" and for several reasons I decided to quit. I have taken the summer off, and am planning to focus on me a bit longer (namely my health) or until someone comes knocking with a good opportunity.
ReplyDeleteMy two biggest pieces of advice are 1) crunch those numbers - gotta make the financial side work and 2) figure out the worst case scenario - if you can live with the worst case scenario then you'll be fine with whatever happens. Regarding number 2, if you can't live with it, then figure out why and tweak, tweak, tweak the plan until it works for YOU. You absolutely must have a certain comfort threshold when you quit - it's individual and you have 40 weeks to figure it out :-)
I am really looking forward to reading your posts. This past summer has been very interesting for me (I've done a lot of think and thinking and more thinking). As of today, it was a good decision to quit. Of course if I am still unemployed in 18 months, I might change my tune ;-)
Exciting times lie ahead!
~ Pru
Great advice - thank you! I'm super excited to get all of the numbers crunched & feel like I have a real plan together. I know that will help me feel like I can make it work. Right now I'm a little bit anxious. ;-)
DeleteWow! That's very exciting for you! You are smart to plan ahead. I look forward to reading about your journey.
ReplyDeleteThanks!! It's a big step, but so excited!
DeleteYeah! I can't tell you how happy this post made me feel.
ReplyDeleteI believe that as your children grow up, they need you around more rather than less. Your sons will look back and remember how great it was having their mom there for them when they were teenagers, and that you weren't stressed to the max.
I agree with the above poster. Figure out the worst case scenario and if you can life with that, everything will be OK. In my case, the worse case scenario actually got worse than we ever imagined, but we came out of it with new goals and a new perspective. I don't think we ever would have dreamed of moving to Hawaii if we hadn't faced the challenges we did.
Go for it!
Thanks!! I feel like I should have been able to come to this decision earlier, but I just wasn't prepared emotionally. We could have figured out the finances, but honestly, I wasn't ready.
DeleteRecent events have reminded that we *say* our family is our top priority, but sometimes our execution falls a little short. Time to fix that. :-)
I am so happy for you! I don't have kids, but I still get stressed and feel I want to spend more time at home. This is wonderful news and I'm sure you'll figure out a great plan.
ReplyDeleteThank you! I never thought I would reach this point, but it feels good to have the decision "made" (I don't think it will feel 100% real until closer to the day, but you know what I mean. Made at least in my mind ;-))
DeleteI think the straight up daily financials have been, by far, the easiest & clearest part of leaving behind my career. The emotional stuff that comes with leaving behind a work identity ... whole 'nother ball of wax.
ReplyDeleteIt's a tough decision and I wish you the best as you navigate this journey and figure out the next step.
I have the same concerns. I am definitely VERY tied up in my work identity, so I'll be reaching out to you. I have lots of questions about how I'm going to handle that part of this. I've been working forever, and very much define myself in that way, which I think is part of the problem
DeleteI have always thought it is easier to work when the kids are young rather than when they get older. As mine reached middle school and high school they had many extracurricular activities that were harder to schedule around an already fixed schedule. Being available made all the difference in the world. As they aged they mentioned that me being present was a pretty decent deterrent to some potentially stupid choices they might have made.
ReplyDeleteThat being said the first year with a "new" income is kind of rough, but then it becomes much easier.
I'm with you on being available for the kids. I feel like I'm missing out on so much now. When they were babies, it didn't feel that way, both because my job was significantly more flexible, and maybe because they weren't doing activities. Just being babies. ;-)
DeleteYes - I'm a little nervous, but know myself & need to have a giant slush fund for the security aspect, and so I feel comfortable leaving.
Congratulations!! Reading your blog, especially the recent post this is an awesome decision for you and your family. :) I'm really excited for you and know you are playing it smart by planning way ahead!
ReplyDeleteThank you!! I'm super excited, although terrified.
DeleteYay! Yay! Yay!!!! I'm really excited for you and for your boys and for your husband. I know you're going to rock out your 40 week plan. You always do with everything else.
ReplyDeleteThank you! It's getting down to serious budgeting time. Can't wait to get the plan implemented & feel like I'm making progress. :-)
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